i was shopping today, and as i was leaving ulta, this family was walking in with a baby in a stroller. a beautiful baby girl... with Down syndrome. i'm positive that she had Ds. but i was in a hurry, the guys were waiting in the van for me. i didn't have time to figure out how to approach them. without appearing to stalk them. i think i may have spoken to the mom on the phone several months ago, for our new parent outreach, but have never had the opportunity to meet them in person. but it might not have been them....
so, what do you do? last year when we were waiting to receive the definitive Ds diagnosis for wyatt, tim and i saw a young woman in target with two beautiful little girls, one i was certain had Ds. i now know her through our local support group and consider her a dear friend...her daughter annabella has Ds; she's a year older than wyatt. but i didn't say anything to her then....a complete stranger....
last spring i was in jcpenney and saw a another woman with a beautiful baby boy....i knew by looking at him that he had Ds. wyatt's occupational therapist had given me the name and phone number of a "new baby" with Ds; clayton, whose mom is april. i had left them a message but had never spoken to them.... as she and i exchanged our "oh what a cute baby...." compliments, i asked her son's name....it was clayton! i said "and you must be april...." we hugged and made plans to get together soon. and we did. and i'm now blessed to call her a close friend!
but sometimes it's really hard to tell with babies if they have Ds....to know for sure just by looking at them. but i usually have a pretty good idea... it's just so hard to know what to say....what if i'm wrong and their baby does not have Ds? then what do i say once i've stuck my foot in my mouth? what do you do?
well, one thing is sure-you can never be sure!!! :)
ReplyDeleteI just ususally (time-permitting) comment on how adorable the baby is and ask his or her name. USUALLY, Caleb is with me and I show him the baby and he signs "baby". I tell the parent(s), "this is our son Caleb". Ususally, that's the ice-breaker. Usually, they ask how old he is and conversation can begin, but not always. If after that, they don't indicate they want to talk, I leave it alone and figure they're just not ready.
If you feel like you're 100% sure, you could let them know about your support meetings. I only mention that if the parents say something regarding Ds though.
:) Good luck!